I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
