I could have mohawked her pubes.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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