Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
