Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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