I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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