Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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