so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
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I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
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I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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