have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
