I can't breathe out the right side of my face
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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