She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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