Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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