chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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