Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
