we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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