Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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