oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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