I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I think my vagina is haunted
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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