woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I yelled at your uterus for you.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
