Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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