i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
