you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.