apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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