Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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