Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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