why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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