i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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