I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
