i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
