Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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