I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize