dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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