...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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