those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize
