I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
this hospital has no fireball
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
