Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
