3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
So much rum. So many feels.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
