so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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