Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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