im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
