10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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