He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
