im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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