Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
the night ended with taco bell and tears
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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