On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
