My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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