So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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