party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
