I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
