haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
