finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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