the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
